Tuesday, July 15, 2008
PimpSay's Response to Beautiful patty306
Thank you for your question patty306. It's a great question and one that more women should ask. Here's my take on it....As i'm answering you patty306, remember this, we men are simple creatures. Too simple to be complicated. Okay, so the convo was good, said he would call on two separate occasions, never did and you stopped calling. Smartest thing you could ever do. You were listening to that inner voice (woman's intuition)that told you that he was worth NOT one more second of your time. I can tell that you have a beautiful spirit about you just by the way you asked your question. That beauty deserves to be responded to in a timely manner. If he cant see that, it's because he's just not that in to you. The right move was to stay moved on...Now, the mistake. You text him two weeks later. What did he do? He did what he was suppose to do as a playa/pimp. He flipped it and put it all on you....You started communicating again and you talk, but ONLY when you call him. He never initiates a call. Why, at the risk of repeating myself, he's just not that in to you. He throws you a bone just in case he decides he wants to bone you at some point down the road. I'm guessing that you're somewhere on the bottom of his "Who do i call when i need my dick sucked list", or maybe at the top of that list, especially since he does'nt call.....either way, PimpSay's advise to you is to move on and stay moved on.
Question from Beautiful patty306
I have a question.... I met this guy and we seemed to really hit off well. Conversation was good. He said he would call me back on two different times and he never did so, I stopped calling. Then I texted him one day about 2 weeks later and he responded and wanted to know why I dont call. So, we started communication again. We talk everytime that I call him but, he never initiates a call. If I text he him he will call or text me back. Am I missing something? How should I proceed?I have a question.... I met this guy and we seemed to really hit off well. Conversation was good. He said he would call me back on two different times and he never did so, I stopped calling. Then I texted him one day about 2 weeks later and he responded and wanted to know why I dont call. So, we started communication again. We talk everytime that I call him but, he never initiates a call. If I text he him he will call or text me back. Am I missing something? How should I proceed?
Monday, June 2, 2008
Timing is EVERYTHING!!!!!!!
PimpSay................So I have a friend, let's call her Mary. Mary calls me one Sunday afternoon all worked up and upset over this new guy she had been hanging out with for the past few weeks. Being the concerned friend i am, i asked her "What happened?' Mary tells me that they had been hanging out all weekend @ his place, having fun and doing what grown folks do. I'm like, okay, cool. Mary then tells me that the plan for Sunday was to just lay around all morning and maybe have brunch before she took herself and her toothbrush home. "Sounds good to me" Sometime Sunday morning, right in the middle of spooning, he gets a phone call. He makes some innocuous nondescript comments and hangs up the phone. He then turns to Mary and tells her that she has to leave because his girlfriend changed her flight and is coming in early. So my girl Mary thinks that NOW is the best time to ask the obvious question, "You have a girlfriend?"Not afraid to repeat himself, he says yes and tells her again that she's gotta go. So Mary jumps out of bed throws on her clothes (didn't wash her ass), and bolts out of his apartment. Mary did say that he made one more comment during her haste to leave and that was, "You don't have to rush out, we just can't do brunch.
So here we are, she's mad as hell at him, and truth be told, at herself as well for playin herself like that, and now looking to me(PimpSay) for a sympathetic ear. So Sunday morning didn't go well for her, and now Sunday afternoon aint gonna provide the kind of relief she wants. Well, as a friend in this situation, I see it as my responsibility to give her what she needs right now and not what she wants. And what she needed was the truth, so here we go.........I started out by asking her the obvious question, "Was that the first time you ask him if he was seeing anyone?" and I got the typical response, "Yes, but he.." I stopped her right there and began to answer her. Why would he say anything? From a man's perspective, if you don't ask us if we're seeing anyone else, we take that as a sign that it doesn't matter to you at that point. And as men, we're hoping that point takes us all the way to the finish line without you asking. This way, it gives us an out, maybe not morally, but definately socially. And really, that's all we need. All we're trying to do is get into your heaven, not 'The Heaven'.
Then Mary came at me with a really good point. He probably would have just lied if i had asked him about a girlfriend. I'm thinking to myself, maybe, but he damn sure didn't lie when he told you you had to get your ass out before his girlfriend showed up, but i kept that to myself. Instead i went in another direction, one more politically correct. Yes, he could have lied, but at least you would have done one of the things you as a woman are suppose to do before you give up the cookie. And that way, if he turned out to be the cookie monster, at least you would have had a right to bitch and complain. It's like voting, if you don't like the way things are being run and you didn't exercise your right to vote, then shut-up and take it.
Okay, so when you do ask the question early on, taking us at our word may not be the most prudent course of action if you're looking to take this somewhere. But there are such things as clues. For instance, you guys were together on the regular for three straight weeks. During that time, did his phone ever ring, he look at it and say something like, "One of my boys, I'll call him back later"? NEWS FLASH!......We always take calls from our boys, why, because it's safe. We don't have to speak in code. We can make you blush by telling our boys that we have to call them back because we are spending time with our baby. So don't tell me in those three weeks his phone never rang around you.
Three weeks together, day in and day out and you never met anybody he knows? Is that possible? Not just weekends right, day in and day out right? Okay. Ladies, maybe you can answer this question for me. At what point do you stop thinking it's all about you and begin to think that maybe he's hiding you from the rest of his world? Four, five weeks, what? He knows your whole crew and all you know is his pizza delievery man.
The other thing I felt Mary needed to hear was why so quick on given out the cookie if you were in the market for something longterm and one on one? If you had waited past the three week mark, playa playa would have been caught up in a time management situation. He already 'Over Paid' for you by seeing you 24/7 and had you trained to expect that. Now ole' girl is back in town and he aint got no wiggle room.
So ladies, if it matters to you, ask the question early on and take your women's intuition with you where ever you go. And if it doesn't matter to you, then hell, don't leave mad, just leave.
So, am I wrong, right, did I miss something? Let me know. Although the game is always the same, there are some very creative people out there putting their own stank on the s**t.
I welcome all comments.
So here we are, she's mad as hell at him, and truth be told, at herself as well for playin herself like that, and now looking to me(PimpSay) for a sympathetic ear. So Sunday morning didn't go well for her, and now Sunday afternoon aint gonna provide the kind of relief she wants. Well, as a friend in this situation, I see it as my responsibility to give her what she needs right now and not what she wants. And what she needed was the truth, so here we go.........I started out by asking her the obvious question, "Was that the first time you ask him if he was seeing anyone?" and I got the typical response, "Yes, but he.." I stopped her right there and began to answer her. Why would he say anything? From a man's perspective, if you don't ask us if we're seeing anyone else, we take that as a sign that it doesn't matter to you at that point. And as men, we're hoping that point takes us all the way to the finish line without you asking. This way, it gives us an out, maybe not morally, but definately socially. And really, that's all we need. All we're trying to do is get into your heaven, not 'The Heaven'.
Then Mary came at me with a really good point. He probably would have just lied if i had asked him about a girlfriend. I'm thinking to myself, maybe, but he damn sure didn't lie when he told you you had to get your ass out before his girlfriend showed up, but i kept that to myself. Instead i went in another direction, one more politically correct. Yes, he could have lied, but at least you would have done one of the things you as a woman are suppose to do before you give up the cookie. And that way, if he turned out to be the cookie monster, at least you would have had a right to bitch and complain. It's like voting, if you don't like the way things are being run and you didn't exercise your right to vote, then shut-up and take it.
Okay, so when you do ask the question early on, taking us at our word may not be the most prudent course of action if you're looking to take this somewhere. But there are such things as clues. For instance, you guys were together on the regular for three straight weeks. During that time, did his phone ever ring, he look at it and say something like, "One of my boys, I'll call him back later"? NEWS FLASH!......We always take calls from our boys, why, because it's safe. We don't have to speak in code. We can make you blush by telling our boys that we have to call them back because we are spending time with our baby. So don't tell me in those three weeks his phone never rang around you.
Three weeks together, day in and day out and you never met anybody he knows? Is that possible? Not just weekends right, day in and day out right? Okay. Ladies, maybe you can answer this question for me. At what point do you stop thinking it's all about you and begin to think that maybe he's hiding you from the rest of his world? Four, five weeks, what? He knows your whole crew and all you know is his pizza delievery man.
The other thing I felt Mary needed to hear was why so quick on given out the cookie if you were in the market for something longterm and one on one? If you had waited past the three week mark, playa playa would have been caught up in a time management situation. He already 'Over Paid' for you by seeing you 24/7 and had you trained to expect that. Now ole' girl is back in town and he aint got no wiggle room.
So ladies, if it matters to you, ask the question early on and take your women's intuition with you where ever you go. And if it doesn't matter to you, then hell, don't leave mad, just leave.
So, am I wrong, right, did I miss something? Let me know. Although the game is always the same, there are some very creative people out there putting their own stank on the s**t.
I welcome all comments.
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Over Paying
PimSay.......So like i said in my about me, i am tired of my dawgs over paying in the beginning just to get some ass on the hook. If your goal is to be out there playing, hence playa, then you need to organize your game so you have time to play. The last thing you want to do is get a woman use to talking to you everyday, seeing you every nite, texting you 24/7 and worse yet, you responding. Her expectations are through the roof. Who's playin who? Now you wanna holla at some new chick and aint got no damn room to manuever. Now what is your dumb ass gone do?
First thing you need to do is give it some thought from the beginning. You've got the number, cool. Put some distance between the calls, not weeks, but a day or two or three here and there should be good. Now, on those days when you do talk to her, your game needs to right. You make sure she feels like there's nothing else you would rather be doing than being in the moment with her. Make sure you end the conversation during a good flow with the excuse of another commitment, other plans, something to show that you have a life, you have something going on, even if you don't. I know it may sound like it contradicts the previous sentence, but trust me, it all works together. Next thing, how are you gonna be a playa and you've got 4 or 5 technical devices on your hip ringing, buzzing and beeping. She got 8 different ways to contact you. Pick a number, any number, but make it only one contact number. And you have voice mail for a reason, use it. Don't answer the phone everytime they call. It's very bad training. Act like you have a life even if you don't.
Hopefully you're beginning to get the point. Listen dawgs, there is more here, a lot more. But the bottom line is this, if you're gonna do your playa thing, you need some space to wag your tails.
So, tell me what's on your mind. What have you seen out there that runs against the game? Let's blog about it and see where it goes. I welcome all comments.
First thing you need to do is give it some thought from the beginning. You've got the number, cool. Put some distance between the calls, not weeks, but a day or two or three here and there should be good. Now, on those days when you do talk to her, your game needs to right. You make sure she feels like there's nothing else you would rather be doing than being in the moment with her. Make sure you end the conversation during a good flow with the excuse of another commitment, other plans, something to show that you have a life, you have something going on, even if you don't. I know it may sound like it contradicts the previous sentence, but trust me, it all works together. Next thing, how are you gonna be a playa and you've got 4 or 5 technical devices on your hip ringing, buzzing and beeping. She got 8 different ways to contact you. Pick a number, any number, but make it only one contact number. And you have voice mail for a reason, use it. Don't answer the phone everytime they call. It's very bad training. Act like you have a life even if you don't.
Hopefully you're beginning to get the point. Listen dawgs, there is more here, a lot more. But the bottom line is this, if you're gonna do your playa thing, you need some space to wag your tails.
So, tell me what's on your mind. What have you seen out there that runs against the game? Let's blog about it and see where it goes. I welcome all comments.
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